:: Idle Neurosis ::

:: Wednesday, September 18, 2002 ::

i'm takin a break from studyin my geology...i never fail to find something else to be doing instead of the task at hand...

another exquisite being: Hurbert Selby

"the visceral experience of the suffering of people- the cruel hallucinations of grace, of peace, of love, of easy street; the wracking ache of sickness, the choking rage of parental/marital/sexual claustraphobia; the tightening screws of paranoid delusion; the pathetic grandoisity of walk-around dreams; and the dread of the inevitable dawn.

life is giving, not getting. to believe that getting stuff is the purpose and aim of life, is madness.

to deny our vision is to sell our soul. getting is living a lie, turning our back on the truth, and visions are glimpses of the truth: obviously nothing external can truly nurture my inner life, my vision.
what happens when i turn my back on my vision and spend my time on the American Dream? i become agitated, uncomfortable in my own skin, because the guilt of abandoning my 'Self/self', of deserting my vision, forces me to apologize for my existence, to need to prove to myself by approaching life as if it's a competition. i have to keep getting stuff in an attempt to appease and satisfy that vague sense of discontent that worms its way through me. yet i know, absolutely, from my experience, that there are no free lunches in life, and eventually we have to accept full and total responsibility for our actions, everything we have dont, and have not done."

album recently purchased: Coldplay; a rush of blood to the head

if you purchase the album(and you definitely should), check out the last page of their insert, 'Politik'. definitely something to think about. mad props.

illusions mistaken for truth are the pavement under our feet
stellar lady:: Anonymous 11:33 PM [+] ::
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